Selfish Help
A man was just ready to jump off a bridge into the river, when a policeman rushed up to him and said, “No! No! Please don’t do that! Why should a young man like you, who has hardly started to live, jump into the river?”
“Listen to me, please! If you jump into the river, I’ll have to jump in after you in order to save you. Try to understand that the water is ice cold, and I have just gotten over a bout of double pneumonia. Do you know what that means? That means I will die. I have a wife and four children. Do you want to have that on your conscience? No. Naturally not. So listen to me. Be reasonable. Repent and God will forgive you. Go back home, where you are all alone and undisturbed…. and there you can hang yourself, if you insist on ending your life.”
– Anthony de Mello
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The next time you want to change someone, ask yourself who you want to benefit by this change: the other person or yourself? Many a time we try to help others in different ways not because of our care or concern for the other, but simply because it fulfills some of our needs, such as need for appreciation etc.